Real Estate Gothic

“I don’t know about those houses,” the young woman said.
“The construction company didn’t level the land.
They built a kind of mound and put the houses on top.
Now it’s like their rain water runs down on all of us.
And now it’s like we always have to look up at them.”

“Is it like those new houses are the kind of houses
vampires would choose to live in so that they could swoop down
on the unsuspecting common folk living below?
Do the new houses make you feel like you are livestock?”

“Umm, no,” the young woman said, “I never thought that, but
now that you said it every time I walk around here
I’m going to be thinking of vampires swooping down
and I’m going to be jumping at every shadow.

“It’s good to be on guard,” I said. “Can’t be too careful.”

“I think,” the young woman said, “that I should be careful
about talking to guys who will make me terrified
when I look up at the new houses every evening.”

“Look at it this way,” I said, “the houses are so high
if a Godzilla-like creature ever comes to life
and stomps around Chicago destroying the suburbs
that mound of new houses will stand out and catch his eye
and I’m sure the creature would make a point to crush them.
Even if there were vampires living in the houses
if the houses were crushed that would destroy their caskets
and the vampires would have no place to hide from the Sun.
Nature works that way. There’s always balance in nature.”

“That’s quite a world-view you’ve got there,” the young woman said.
“Be on guard against vampires and hope for salvation
from a dinosaur trying to destroy the city.”

“Thanks,” I said. “I’m thinking of doing a puppet show.”

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